This weekend, I sensed in prayer that I was to speak on the orphan mentality. Someone who has an orphan mentality is usually someone who has a very difficult time trusting anyone but themselves. They are bound by fear, and crave intimacy, yet, shuns it the same, because it requires a trust they cannot give. They are extremely independent, and rely on nobody more than themselves to get things done, or to simply do anything. Orphan mentality produces a victim spirit, one which causes a person to justify his/her own actions by blaming others. There is never responsibility taken. It's always "their fault". A disagreement on any issue equals an assault on their very being.
I was talking to my good friend who actually is an orphan, and she told me that as an orphan, she did what she could to survive, and there was nobody for her until she was adopted, and even then, she had developed such habits as to not allow anyone to do for her, for she might learn to open up and believe in them, and eventually love them, and THAT's when they would pull the rug out from under her. We as people, even though many of us were not orphaned as babies or small children, have all possessed the same tendencies, because unless we know true Love from a Father who made us, who loves, who will never leave us, or who will never be too busy for us, or who will never be exasperated with us because we want His attention or because we don't; unless we know the perfect Love, we will possess an orphan spirit. This kind of mentality causes us to be lords of our own lives in everything we do. We make all the decisions, we decide what is best for us, we judge others who don't measure to our standards, or who may simply have a difference of opinion. Anyone who runs in our circles become competition, not friends. Resentment, jealousy, rebellion, and independence become companions to help us through our day. Before we know it, we are not the ones in control, but we are the ones controlled. Therefore, any form of civility is mere act. We really just wanted our parents to love us. Can I say that?
As I shared this to both the master's commission group in downtown atlanta, and the next afternoon at the Holy Spirit Encounter in North Georgia, the response was incredible. So many people are dealing with this sense about themselves. God opened the door to forgive, and to repent. His love in the room was so real, and people responded. People repented of pornography, infidelity, drugs and alcohol, hate and bitterness towards others who wounded them. They made a declaration right there that they were not going to continue the cycle of rejection, and wounding others.
I was able to speak to most of all who came to the Holy Spirit conference, and almost to a man, there was a new, fresh understanding of what they had been under all these years, and also a fresh determination for freedom from such an identity as the orphan spirit.
I encourage all reading this blog, the only way to displace the absolute feeling of inadequacy, or illegitimacy, is to know who you really are. The only way to know who you really are is to encounter the revelation that God LOVES YOU. YES YOU. The world can try to pull you down to it, and all its ruin, but when you have the love and support of your dad, let them try. How much more when Abba Father the Maker of all, has His eyes on you, and loves you with all His heart! Then and only then, can you be free from opinions, from expectations, and free to trust others. For me, it is still a work in progress, but I am so excited about who He is, and who He says that I am. No man can ever take that away.
Romans 8:14-17
14 For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. 15 The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.[f] And by him we cry, “Abba,[g] Father.” 16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. 17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.
